Apr 30/05 — Shabbat Pesach

Commentary by Chazzan Aníbal Mass

I still remember my surprise when I saw on the cover of a very influential magazine, the picture of a new robo-dog designed by Sony. This electronic and very sophisticated pet has all the advantages of a real dog: it reacts to stimulus, is kind with people, plays all day with the kids, etc. — and has none of the disadvantages of a real one: it doesn’t soil, it doesn’t bark at night and it doesn’t try to eat the postman … and of course, you will never have to worry about finding a keeper for your vacations.

Now, believe me that if this Japanese company spent millions of dollars developing this amazing product, it is because they arrived at the conclusion that thousands of them will find a master ready to pay its price. This should not surprise us, because we can observe a growing tendency in the world to seek only those things that benefit us, while rejecting anything that smells remotely problematic.

If we use this philosophy to buy a house or a new car, that’s fine, but if we start to follow this philosophy in our relationships with people, we are taking a position far from the teachings of the Torah.

Human beings were not created with the exclusive objective of being efficient. We are not machines, with an investment cost that needs to be amortized. Efficiency is beneficial, of course, but it should never be an aim in itself.

And we have a worse problem when this focus in life involves the education of our kids. We are submerged in a world so materialistic and goal oriented that we think our mission is to produce “successful” and “super-efficient” kids. Sometimes, if we start to feel that this objective is impossible, our home environment begins to deteriorate and the atmosphere becomes tense and tight.

Our goal is not to produce super-kids, but to educate them with values and spirituality that will make them great individuals, living lives of kindness with high ethical standards, without putting the accent on efficiency, but on pure intentions.

The Jewish people are celebrating the Festival of Pesach, the festival where parents and kids interact more than other days in the Jewish calendar. During this festival, kids have the opportunity to ask their parents and parents have a unique opportunity to teach their kids. In this special moment, we can discover that the perfect kid doesn’t exist, as does Sony’s dog, but they are human beings with their own ideas and dreams.

I’m sure that you have read during the Seder the story of the four types of children: one who is wise and one who is contrary; one who is simple and one who doesn’t even know how to ask a question. The Midrash says that the people of Israel were very happy when Moses told them that when they settled in the Promised Land they needed to celebrate the Seder and that there would be four types of children asking in four different ways, “What is the meaning of Pesach?” And Rashi asked: how they could be happy knowing that they would have a rebellious son?

My answer is: because they knew that the perfect child doesn’t exist. They were happy after Moses made the announcement because just the blessing of raising kids, no matter which of the four types they are, is a good reason to be happy. They knew that inevitably everyone passes from one level to another. (Come on, be honest. Can you remember your infancy and youth?)

I want to encourage you to take advantage of these remaining days of Pesach to approach your children and be capable of asking questions of each other. Not only the “Mah Nishtanah”, but about what we expect from one another, as human beings, with our virtues and our defects.